In the business world – what you say and what you do are the only 2 things that matter. Nobody really cares how good or bad you are from the Inside.
Remember that once you say something, you can never take it back. If you are upset and you tell your subordinate that he is a worthless Idiot – telling him later that you didn’t mean it, won’t repair the damage done. Once you say something it stays. Irrespective of whether you mean it or not – words once uttered cannot be taken back.
Be careful of what you say when you are in a bad state of mind. One thing said could damage a relationship you have built over years. The scare you put on that relationship would be a lasting one. The good deeds you have done through the years will be sidelined and the few nasty words you said would take focus.
Professionals usually lose their cool on people they believe they can afford to lose their cool on – like their small customers, their subordinate etc. The Manager would usually blow his top at his team and yet not do the same with his own boss since he knows the repercussion would be detrimental to his own career. That is proof that all professionals can keep their calm and control their emotion even if they are seething from the inside.
The difference between a good professional and a bad one is one’s ability to soak work pressure and not pass it on to the other people. Eg. If you are at the receiving end of a chiding from your boss – you should not go and download the same to your team. This passing on of anger & frustration in business is called Emotional Leakage. Pass on the message. Do not pass on the use of nasty words because it may not help the cause. The same is true with dealing with the customer. You could have had a tough interaction with one customer which could put you in a bad state of mind. But if you pass on your frustrations build up due to one customer on another customer, you have created bad blood with both customers.
Are you not going to be in a bad state of mind when at receiving end of a customer/boss/colleague that looses their cool? You definitely will. However, the key to being a good professional is your ability to control your cool right at that time by being totally conscious of your behavior. Take a walk outside if that helps. Do the stuff that puts you in a good state of mind. You may have to act like you are normal even if you are not.
The higher you go in any organization, the more pressure you will have. Your responsibilities will increase manifold. The frustration & problems will mount too. One of the keys to being a good manager/professionals is your ability to maintain you’re cool.